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Thinking about proposing soon? There is so much to consider! Location, weather, venue, wardrobe, the ring, and so much more… One of the overlooked things is who to invite? Oftentimes, everyone is invited! Family, friends- really anyone who is close to the couple.
And let’s be honest, there is nothing wrong with this at all. Family and friends bring excitement and fun to the proposal. If you guys love groups, lots of cheering, and excitement – bring the whole family! However, if you are wondering if bringing grandma or your soon to be mother-in-law to your proposal is a good idea, this article is for you.
Today we want to share with you a our top 3 reasons why you might want to consider not inviting anyone to the marriage proposal. It might be a tough decision to make, but we have your back.
Some family members get over-involved
More often than not, family members do have the best intentions when they get involved. They are not trying to ruin your proposal. They are as excited as you are and want your day to be magical and as special as can be. They also want to help in any way they can.
But sometimes, the “help” turns into the over-involvement of your mom or soon to be mother-in-law. You tell them your idea and they run with it- while adding their own spin or twist. Again, we know they are not doing it to go against your wishes, they truly think it will make it better. The problem with this is that your proposal can end up not being true to the way you meant for it to be. If you are looking for a very specific turnout, asking family to help might not be the way to go.
Over-involvement can lead to disappointment for you or sweetheart as you may not get what you dreamt of. You have to decide if it is a risk you are willing to take or not.
PRO TIP: If you do decide to involve family, have the discussion with them before your proposal and let them know what you do and do not authorize them to change. For example, you may give them permission to change the position of a table but you may say that you absolutely do not want something else relocated.
Have to spend part of your budget on them
This is one of my biggest pet peeves when it comes to including family and friends in the marriage proposal and the truth is, most people don’t think of this when planning their proposal. When you have family and friends present, you are going to need to feed them – or at least offer drinks and hors d’oeuvres. Now this is all fine and dandy if you have extra budget in it. But if you have to pull budget from your proposal idea, that is what I caution against. After all, the proposal should be about the 2 people getting engaged and a proposal is a once-in-a-lifetime event.
If you do not want to spend part of your budget on feeding or entertaining them, invite less people or no one at all. Spend the budget on yourselves and celebrate with a fancy dinner instead!
Can’t be as intimate
When it is just you and your sweetheart, a proposal is one of the most intimate memories of your relationship. There is something about proposals that are just so magical. Maybe it is soulmates agreeing to spend forever together or the romance involved in the whole event. But it is truly unlike any other feeling.
Believe us when we say- you are never going to forget your engagement day and how you felt. You very well may want this to be an intimate, very special moment just between the two of you. And there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. You both deserve to enjoy this moment together to the max, and if doing so alone would make it even better – so be it!
We sincerely hope you take careful consideration into what YOU as a COUPLE want for your special day. Not what your mom wants, or any other family member. This is about you both, so choose what you want, stand firm, and enjoy your day alone if that is what you want.
How can you ensure you get what you want?
Hire The Heart Bandits to make sure your special moment goes just the way you want it to. We can help you come up with the perfect proposal ideas, execute it flawlessly, and make sure your vision is carried out. We help you through all of the tough decisions like should you include family, how much budget to spend on entertaining guests, and more. The day you get engaged should be memorable and deserves to be everything you both have ever dreamt it up to be! Contact us today.